Sunday, March 4, 2012

to the boys.

i've had several (and by several i mean eight) boys ask me to do a post like this one about what girls look for in guys. 

i asked some girls these three questions:
1) what do you look for in a guy? what's most important?
2) how important is it to you that a guy has a great personality?
3) if you could change one thing about boys or if you could tell the male race anything, what would it be?
and this is what they said.

joy. respect, humility, and humor. those are probably the three most important things to me in a guuy. i love when guys are gentlemen. it makes girls feel special and important. as far as humility goes... cockiness is a turnoff but confidence is nice. a guys is ten times more attractive when he's humble. i also think having a great sense of humor is very important. laughing is one of the best things in life. its always more fun when a guy is able to joke around and laugh with you. personality is everything. looks don't get ya very far. a guy with personality is so much more enjoyable to be around than someone who's good looking but dense. also, DATE GIRLS. girls like to get asked on dates. don't be scared. just do it.

katie. i think what's most important in any guy is their personality and their ability to make someone laugh and just have a good time with them. of course you'll notice their looks, but its more about how they carry themselves and how they have a conversation with you. its not about how someone looks but how you click with them. confidence is key. i feel like boys don't need to be afraid to make the first move or approach a girl and just ask her on a date. we love that sappy romantic stuff (and we like to get dressed up too). it may sound cliche, but just be yourself. you want someone to like you for who you are and not for what someone else wants you to be. a simple smile and a casual hello can work wonders. 

kalea. i look for a guy who's confident in who they are, who's easygoing and independent. the most important thing is that they're respectful and loyal. personality is pretty important. no personality leads to awkward moments and not the type you can laugh at later! if i could tell the boys anything it would be that manners are a huge necessity and that possessive behaviors in a relationship are undesirable.

ashley. i want a guy that shows me he cares about me & even if we are just friends he'll hang out with me and show he cares about me. one of the most important things is that they act the same whether we're alone or with his friends. i don't want a guy that acts all immature and thinks its all about him. having a personality is so important. it gives us things to talk about that are meaningful and if he has a personality he is more likely to want to cuddle and show that he cares about the people in his life. if i could change one thing about the male race... i would tell them that its okay to be just friends with girls. not every girl out there needs to become a date. but if you want to take us out, call us or ask us in person. texts are not okay.

clara. okay, i'm going to be completely honest here, boys. a girl will always remember the way you treat her. not only will she remember it, but she'll gossip to all her friends about it. sho when you do something, you'll get a rep. i promise. so make it a good one. i know guys worry about rejection and all that jazz but don't. seriously. if you ask a girl out, there's a 95% chance she'll say yes, unless she's truly busy. go on dates often and don't date the same people over and over. variety is nice. we want to be asked out by a bunch of different guys and its your job to ask us, so don't slack off. we like the cute little surprises from boys, and i'm not lying when i say the little things make the most difference. you could spend $100 on a date, but to be honest, i'll have more jun messing around on a playground or something. let girls know you when you think they're special. text us little messages like "good moring, i hope you have a good day!" or simple things like that. i promise that one text can turn our moods right around. it definitely never hurts to do cheesy things like buy a girls flowers, opening her door, taking her on walks. in fact, its a definite plus. let her talk to you and just let her know you're interested in what she has to say. most of all, just listen. a lot of the time girls question how genuine boys are, but i promise that if you're just yourself, girls will love being around you. just be respectful. we know how we deserve to be treated, and if you don't treat us right, i guarantee we'll move on and find someone else that will. i know sometimes we're crazy and we don't even know how we feel but just continue to let us know that we matter. the biggest turn on for me is when i can go out all day with a boyand have a total blast, and then at night just sit and talk to him. those talks are the best things and we always rememeber them. make sure you can communicate with us. there's nothing worse that a date where the guy doesn't talk to you. be fun, crack jokes, and make us laugh. make sure you're staying pure and making the choices that will take you the direction you want to go in your life. there's no need to go overboard, just do small things. be nice and strike up a conversation and good things are sure to follow!

anonymous. i look for lots of things. but the first thing is a smile. smiles are just great. i like guys that can carry on conversations so yes personality is very important! i guess i notice guys when they're nice to everyone. every guy is so different, but personality and maturity are always important.

summer. the most important thing to me in a guy is his personality. if he makes me laugh, i'm automatically attracted to him, no matter what he looks like. i want him to make me feel like i'm the most important person in the world when i'm talking to him by paying attention to what i'm saying. PERSONALITY IS SOOOOOOO IMPORTANT. #1 PRIORITY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! don't be afraid to talk to girls. we all love to talk, its just a given. so get to know them, and don't be afraid of them judging you!

anonymous. i look for someone who's caring. they treat everyone with respect, no matter who's watching. they have to be able to make me laugh. also, they need to be smart. who cares if they're drop dead gorgeous if they can't even hold a conversation? the perfect guy has to have big dreams for himself, the ambition to actually complete them and be supportive of my dreams as well. above all, they just need to be themselves. its extremely important to have a good personality. looks are always going to be the first thing you notice, but an ugly personality can automatically turn the hottest guy to the ugliest person on the planet. i think personality is basically the most important thing to look at because that's the person you're choosing to spend your time with. they have to make you happy. if i could tell the male race anything, it would be to bring back chivalry. my biggest pet peeve is when a guy lets the door slam in my face instead of holding it open for me. also, learn to dance. actually dance. all this dry humping on the dance floor is crap. just sayin'.

alyssa. well for me, i look for a guy who i can be myself with and who i can talk to. that's really everything to me. personality is EVERYTHING. i mean, duh, good looking guys are great and all.. but if they don't have a good personality, then personally... i don't think i'd ever be interested no matter how "hot" they are. if i could change anything about guys i'd just want them to be less confusing. if you have feelings for a girl just tell her. girls really do respect when boys are straight up honest with them.

mallory. i look for lots of things in guys. its important that they know who they are, that they live their standards, that they act themselves around me and let me act like myself, they're honest, love their families, and who's always there for me. most importantly, though, they have to be genuinely kind to every single person, especially their families. it bothers me when guys are super nice to his friends then turns around and is a jerk to his family or others. remember that you set a huge example to us girls. we're watching to figure out what we like and don't like. guys that are fun and happy and funny are the best to be around. remember your smiles go a long way. smiles are the greatest. share it with everyone! there is a difference between confidence and cockiness. be confident in what you've accomplished and who you are, but remember that there are other people that matter besides yourself. i'm not saying all guys are cocky, but its a huge turnoff to us girls. also remember that when we like you, we don't want to hear about your exgirlfriends or who you think is hot. compliment us and let us know you care.

shaleice. It's true that looks are far less important than personality to us girls, but that doesn't mean you get to let yourself go. It does count, a little. There are a lot of different personalities, and as long as your being yourself, then it's perfect. We love chivalry. LOVE. Open doors for us, and we will love you. Be a complete 1800's southern gentlemen, and we will love you 20 times more. Don't talk badly about other girls/guys. It's okay to say, "We don't get along," or something, but don't make a hatefest. It just makes us think you're jerks, and it's a turn off. Confidence is key. No matter how you look, no one can resist a guy who is confident. I say confident, not egotistical. Humble confidence is where it's all at.TAKE INITITAVE! Inititave is manly, and attractive. Don't just be nice to the girls you like and ignore those you don't. It shows just how amazing of a person you are when you show that you see that girls deserve respect, and are daughters of god. Most of us try to return the same courtesy to you. Have a passion for life, for something you love to do! Nothing is more unattractive than a guy who doesn't care about or do anything.

and finally. (& this is my total honest opinion.)

me. the first thing i notice about a guy when he walks into a room is how others react to him. if they go up to him and give him a hug or a high five or are just happy to see him then he's someone that i want to get to know. if they just look at him or make a face when he walks in, that's not a good sign. i like big hugs. i like boys that are willing to come up to me at a party or something and ask me what my name is and things like that. i like it when boys are outgoing and i'm sorry but if you have no sense of humor, i'm not going to want to talk to you. i crack jokes often and i like it when boys can throw them right back at me. make me laugh! i like tall boys that have good teeth (sorry, random i know). also, they have to have motivation and ambition. lets face it, swag doesn't pay the bills. i don't care how cool you think you are, but if you're failing all your high school classes because you just don't care, i'm not going to want to get to know you or even be around you. i like smart boys because honestly, if you're dumber than i am i have no business being in a relationship with you. i want to be able to interact with you on my level without dumbing myself down. i think its really important for boys to be gentlemen. again with the whole "i'm too cool for you." okay, NO. that is not okay. if you see a girl that needs help, its your duty as a man to stop and help her, whether it be like car problems or opening a door or whatever it is. boys should honor themselves and respect their parents. to sum it up, be helpful, kind, pure, respectful, and honest. and basically, thats my recipe for a perfect man.

so boys. there you have it.
(i hope you learned something.)

much love,
jessica :)

please share :)

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