and then i remember why i'm not a roper.

i am not very good at roping. at all. as in zero. 

i think it's a blast, and i love it, but i'm really not good at it.

that's okay though, i'll sit on the horses while everyone else ropes any day :)

xoxo

jessica :)

the time i went third wheeling...

just kidding. i wasn't actually a third wheel. but i liked the title, i thought it was clever.

going into the mountains and going shooting is probably my favorite thing ever. 

big thanks to jake. it was a blast.

happy easter.

 

i love easter. after christmas, it's my favorite holiday.

 

this year was really, really hard for me. i made a lot of mistakes and went through miles and miles of hard times. this easter marks a year from the time my family was uprooted & my life was turned upside down, and so i have a certain tenderness and appreciation for this time of year. i love what easter is all about. it's not about a new dress to wear to church, or a fun easter basket with spring colored nail polish & lots of jelly beans and easter eggs. it's about recognizing Christ's sacrifice and resurrection and renewing our lives & being thankful for Him.

 

some people think it's a little crazy to put all your faith into someone who supposedly saved the entire human race. but you know what? i belive in Him. I have a relationship with him. 

because He did save us.

and i know he did.

 

how do i know?

i've prayed about it. i've read the scriptures and asked heavenly father to know if Jesus really was who we say He is. i've talked with my church leaders, my mom & dad, grandparents, friends, aunts and uncles, basically anyone who would talk to me about my questions. and i received an answer.

to me, Christ is more than a spiritual leader who taught people moral lessons two thousand years ago. to me, Christ is my personal redeemer. He suffered beyond what anyone imagined was possible. He was ridiculed and mocked and ultimately killed, because He knew what his purpose was. He was laid in a tomb after his crucifixion, and then three days later, He walked out perfectly alive and with a perfect body.

because He suffered for you and i, because He suffered death, we can live again.

this year especially means a lot to me because i have had too many friends & family members pass away this year, and knowing i can see them again and that they are still with me gives me so much comfort. it's hard when someone you've been friends with for years and years suddenly be gone. its a harsh reality. they were all my age, went to high school with me, i laughed and went on dates and parties with these guys. in some cases, it's my friends siblings. it's beyond what was expected but it's alright in the end. He lives. He is a living witness that death can be overcome. it is so wonderful to know that we can see those we love who have passed on again- because of the wonderful gift that our older brother gave us.

we can become perfect because He suffered for us. He loves us, and i am so grateful for Him.

 

sun & pickup trucks

i especially love days like today.

in the pre-vet & equine programs, there's an awesome sense of camaraderie. i've only known most of them for less than a year, but i'm going to be with them for the next five or six. we're all so different, from all over the nation, but we all have a common purpose. we're here to help animals, and by extension, help their owners. working with people on farms really brings you together. today i was talking to a guy in one of my classes and he said "you know jess, i'd trust you to stitch me up if i had a really bad gash and i couldn't make it to a hospital." haha what a compliment, huh?  i trust these guys & girls more than anyone. i mean, we let each other drive each other's trucks... thats like the highest form of trust. they've got my back & i love them. 

the sun today was so incredibly needed. i forgot what it was like to get in your car and having to roll the windows down because it's hot inside, or to be walking around classes and get too warm with a sweatshirt on. it's kinda awesome. hey spring. you should stick around for a while. :)

xoxo

jessica :)

a mission post.

this beautiful girl is one of my best friends in the entire world. 

we were unlikely friends, but she has changed my life in such a huge way i can't even describe it. she was there for me in the happiest & darkest times of my life, when i didn't know if i was going to make it through high school, & whenever i needed a smile or a hug. she's at byu now, and still is there for me, even when i call her in at 1am. we have made so many incredible memories. i am so proud of her decision to serve a mission for The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. Clara is called to serve & teach the people of Montevideo, Uruguay. 

i am so excited for her & for the people in uruguay who get to meet this girl. 

they are beyond lucky and i hope they take advantage of every second they have with her.

i'm so proud of you baby girl. love you forever and always.

to learn more about missions and what they do, click here.

kind of awesome.

i tend to forget that it's in the small things that heavenly father works amazing miracles. 

today.

"if you don't know where you're goin, you might end up somewhere else."

if you look in the trash can at work, all you're gonna see is baling twine and probably 300 cans of mountain dew. i don't know what it is with all these guys being so obsessed with it. to be honest, i cant really handle it. it makes me go super insane. haha.

i love going on walks. at least when it's nice-ish. when it's freezing cold outside, not so much. but today was seriously beautiful & i couldn't resist going on a long walk around campus. and i didn't even wear shoes. whaaaaaa. i know summer is just around the corner when i can walk around barefoot without my feet freezing. 

the gutter at work broke. and not only did it break, it's broken until tuesday. and guess who works every stinkin day until then? me. ughhh. there's probably nothing that makes me more pissed than having to haul out all that shit by hand. but, talking to the old farmers after work about it was stinkin hilarious. according to them, the gutter system was supposed to be the "next new thing" in tie stall technology but  i quote: "that thing is bigger shit than the stuff that's supposed to go in it!" i laughed so hard.

at the equine center i had an interesting experience with a mare not-so-fondly named "man-eater" today. WHAT A NIGHTMARE. seriously. she's awful. i have never been so terrified while cleaning a stall. but on the bright side, the foals are so cute. they're at that age where their personalities are showing and they just want to play with you and they are about too cute to handle.

life is good. 

xo.

jess :)

there is absolutely no reason for me to put pants on today.

1) i love this place. the sunrises are always phenomenal & make me glad to be alive.
2) just because i said no to one guy does not automatically make me dating the other one. i don't even like him. you guys are retarded. stop jumping to conclusions.
3) people are so dishonest sometimes it makes me sick. if there is one thing i've learned in the last year it's that honesty is the most important factor in any relationship. also, don't lie about stupid things because you're jealous of someone else.
4) i wish i could fall back asleep right now.
5) i have learned the past few months that having people come into your life that are just like you can be either an amazing blessing or a serious temptation.
6) for being spring break, there's a surprising amount of people walking around campus.
7) i make mistakes. i'm human. i know one thing and then sometimes i go and do another. but wanna know something? that's okay. every day i'm working towards a greater goal. some days are harder than others, and sometimes i'm embarrassed about things i've done, but the beauty of it is that i can shake it off and be forgiven and it's all alright again.
8) i'm loving working at the farm & the dairy this week. it's always nice to get some variety.
9) i really wish i was still in idaho.. this whole "lets spend spring break in logan" thing sucks.
10) there is absolutely no reason for me to put pants on today and i am so glad.

that about sums it all up. have an amazing day you guys!
xoxox
jessica :)

i'm baaack.

i seriously hope this week doesn't suck. 

we are just too dang cute.

i have the most beautiful paint horse on the planet. i've seen plenty of APHA's & not one of them measures up to this beauty. i was talking to my mom today when we were running errands and she said that she swears one of the only reasons i made it through high school happy is because of butterscotch, and i believe it. i'm the happiest when i'm with her. she's sassy and sweet a little ornery, but then again, so am i. everyone who meets here is instantly in love with her. i can hardly believe she'll be seventeen this year... so weird. i miss her like crazy when i'm at school. one day she'll be there with me. and i cannot wait for that day. 

xoxo

jessica

idahome.

i have never been so happy to see this sign in my entire life. when i made it into boise, a quick stop was made to see my best friend and after i left her apartment, i sat in my truck and had a good cry for a little while because 1) i am beyond glad to get out of utah 2) i hate that i have to leave tuesday 3) i've been up since 3:30 this morning 4) i am just so dang glad to be home. i didn't realize how homesick i was until i got there and smelled the idaho air and felt the 55 degree weather and saw the horses and old friends... all my emotions just piled up and spilled out my eyes. and you know what? it felt good to cry. it's a seven hour drive (give or take) from school to home, and it's kinda hard to drive it by myself. i always get bored around the 51/2 hour mark... thanks to really huge fountain drinks & 80s music the last hour and a half is bearable. barely. heres to an amazing three days. 

-jessica :)

i like me.

i like who i'm becoming. 

i like that i wear too much camo, that my boots track mud everywhere and it drives my roommates crazy, that i could care less about what people are saying about me. i like that i don't have to pretend i'm something that i'm not, and people like me for who i am. i like that i have a relationship with Christ & that he's with me no matter what i do or where i go, that i have the strength and ability to do what's right without worrying about what those around me are trying to convince me to do. i like that i'm best friends with my little brother, and that i'm confident in my talents and abilities. i like that i know i can work hard and follow through with what i say i'm going to do. but really, i'm glad i'm just me. :)

xo

jess

what the crap?

have you ever had those days when you look back on it and you're like, "what the fricken crap happened today?" it's been a weird day. no one needs to know details at the moment. but just know it was weird. good. but weird.

i think i'm sick. i turned down luke bryan concert tickets.

as recently discussed with a friend, one of my top pet peeves is when people show up unannounced to my house/apartment/where ever i am at the time. like seriously i hate it. it's one thing if they shoot me a text sayin something like "hey i'm coming over!" and then come over but seriously if you just show up and want me to entertain you there's a 97% chance i'll tell you to go home. and i ain't even sorry.

you know that cinnamon chunk bread from great harvest? i want some.

okay jess go to bed before you hurt yourself.

xoxoxo
                                                                                                                                                         

yikes.

seriously. i've been hardcore craving cinnamon rolls this week.

i. am. so excited. for next week. i get to see my best friend in the whole world, go ride some good horses with my favorite ex boyfriend & family... it'll be a good time.

could everyone quit getting engaged and married and quit having babies please? thank you. i appreciate it. its making me feel old and dammit, i'm not old. i'm eighteen. 

i'm ready for spring break to get here. five more days. i can do this. i feel burned out. midterms suck.

usually i don't like texting... but i like texting him.

i reorganized my entire itunes library. things learned: 1) i have so many songs. 2) playlists are really hard to name. 3) there are a lot of songs i forgot i had that i'm in love with.

boys are seriously simplistic. they like to talk about themselves, eat food, and be complimented. PLOT TWIST: thats what girls like too. whaaaat?

okay thats all. love you peace out and all that good junk.
xoxo
jessica :)

march madness but not the basketball kind.

how is it march already? that just blows my mind. 

i'm so excited for this month. spring break, hanging out with my favorite boys, midterms, lots of fun opportunities and trips... yeah should be a good one.