Tuesday, June 4, 2013

life lessons suck sometimes.

today i'm grateful for the people i know, but especially for two guys in particular.

one walked into my life on complete accident. 
we met through mutual friends one weekend & to be honest, i never expected to hear from him again but we stayed in contact. a month later, after the worst day of my life to date, when no one else was there (literally), he stopped by to pick me up, dust me off and tell me everything was going to be okay. i'm grateful that he stepped and and gave me a few friendly &loving slaps to let me know that i was still alive, crap happens, and life was going to move on. he's become one of the best friends i've ever had to date, and i'm so glad he puts up with my bitchy days, crazy days, sad days, happy days, and all the days in between. several heart to heart conversations and about a hundred card games later, i finally feel much better about life. i wish i could say that things are the same as they were... i can't though. but wanna know something? i'm okay with that. i'm doing good.

the other i met a few weeks after he got back from serving an lds mission. 
he's an awesome guy. seriously amazing. spiritual, funny, not bad looking at all, and is a blast to hang out with & talk to. we went on a date or two, and got along great, but after realizing my life was not in the order it needed to be to carry on a relationship, i treated him kind of awful. i mean, i was my worst self at one point with him. there's no excuse, but i needed a reason for us to stop talking and i guess it worked. i haven't talked to him for a few weeks, and i feel really bad about that. but, the reason i'm grateful for him today is because he helped me realize that there are some things in my life that need to change. i need to get some shiz together and grow up a little bit. so, i thank him for that. 

its crazy to me how much people can teach you about yourself without even knowing it. every person i've met so far this summer has taught me a lesson, probably without me or them even knowing it. but, both of these guys has taught me that life doesn't have to be perfect to be wonderful. and my life really is wonderful. i don't have much to complain about.

lastly, if you're reading this, thank you, no matter what role you play in my life. thank you for keeping me in check, loving me, helping me out. thank you for ignoring me, driving me absolutely insane. thank you for making me want to punch you in the face because you're so stupid. thank you for not hating me after i say something rude without meaning it. thank you for giving me a hug when i need it, talking to me for hours on the phone, sending me a funny picture because it reminded me of something we did together. i'm learning and growing every day. 

thank you. 

jessica :)

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